Cat and Mouse: Inside Greenwich's Great Parking Game
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If you want a masterclass in creative problem-solving, look no further than how Greenwich residents avoid parking tickets.
At the August 13 Board of Selectmen meeting, about-to-retire Deputy Police Chief Jim Bonney—who oversees the Parking Services Department—proposed a colorful list of amendments to the town's traffic and parking ordinances. While the meeting was technically about updating municipal code, the real story was a hilarious look at the ingenious loopholes locals have exploited for years, countered by a witty officer signing off in style.
Here are some of the cleverest tactics Deputy Chief Bonney called out, and the new rules designed to shut them down:
The "My Permit Was Stolen...Again" Miracle
The Loophole: If you "lose" a parking permit, you pay full price to replace it. But if it’s "stolen," a simple $10 administrative fee gets you a brand-new one.
The Catch: Curiously, out of all the lots in town, the hyper-expensive Greenwich Plaza lot—which boasts the longest waitlist—is where permits mysteriously vanish the most. As Bonney quipped, people claim the guy drying their car at the car wash must have stolen it because "he must be commuting to Manhattan every week." In reality, folks were likely handing them off to family members.
The Fix: The updated ordinance requires an official police report of the theft, and the Director of Parking Services now has the authority to review and approve whether a permit was genuinely stolen.
The Nine-Inch "Commute"
The Loophole: To skirt long-term residential street parking limits, clever drivers claim they are strictly following the rules by moving their cars daily. The catch? They move them precisely nine inches. According to Bonney, some of these vehicles aren't even operating—they are disabled cars literally pushed back and forth a few feet every day.
The Fix: A fresh definition for a "moved vehicle": the car must completely vacate the space for at least 2 hours.
Escalades in "Compact" Spaces
The Loophole: Drivers love squeezing massive full-size SUVs into spots explicitly painted and designated for small or compact cars.
The Fix: Bonney reminded everyone that "small car" does not translate to a Cadillac Escalade or a Chevy Suburban. The new ordinance officially codifies dimensions: a compact car must be less than 18 feet long and 72 inches wide.
The Belle Haven Morning Traffic Jam
The Loophole: Landscape, cleaning, and construction crews line up in fleets of 8 or 9 vehicles deep on Field Point Road and Shore Road, idling outside the Belle Haven gates before they open at 7:45 AM. Though "No Parking" signs are posted, the specific street language left a loophole that made enforcement tricky.
The Fix: Both roads from Field Point Circle to Intervale Road are officially locked down with updated no-parking/standing restrictions.
The Cost of the Game is Rising
Playing the system is about to get a little pricier across the board. The town is instituting a 10% permit price hike (reflecting a 2% increase per year over the last 5 years). The bump is designed to offset inflation and fund massive capital projects—including a grueling $1 million repair of the Greenwich Plaza parking lot ceiling, which requires painstaking hand labor due to low clearance.
Between the Lines: Greenwich drivers might be remarkably resourceful, but Deputy Chief Bonney proved that enforcement doesn't have to be humorless. As he prepares to retire, he leaves behind a tightened set of rules—and a great reminder of just how far locals will go to save $10 or dodge a long walk.